From Mom November 29, 2014

Saturday, November 29, 2014

Hi Riley,

I’m racing the deadline here.  We’ve had a slow morning and I had to cook breakfast because no one ate pumpkin pie as I had hoped.  I guess that only works the morning after Thanksgiving.  But as soon as the butter was sizzling in the skillet, they all revived.

Dad went fishing at the dam last night with Parker and Elise and D and Z.  They brought home 10 large fish, a feast! 

Dad has the new door to the storage room installed and it swings the right way.  Hurray!

Yesterday my new router arrived from Amazon and I was so excited to get it set up.  But would you believe it came broken?  I spent an hour figuring that out and verifying with their technical support department.  So I went to Best Buy on Black Friday.  I was in agony at the thought of it.  But they had an unmarked deal on a great router which works great for $20 less than the one I’d bought on Amazon. And though the parking lot was crazy, the store was fine and I even got individual help picking out the router.  The sales guy couldn’t find the price on the one I was considering and came back excited because it was $90 instead of the usual price of $150.

Thanksgiving was nice up at Grandma’s.  B G was great company and looks brighter than he has in some time.  He’s working-full time and taking 16 credits at Weber State and getting all A’s.  He going to transfer to the U I think this winter.  Grandpa has been scanning old pictures from when I was young and sending them.  You can just tell that he is enjoying this trip down memory lane.

This is so short.  But I just wanted you to know that we miss you and we are thinking of you.

Much love,

Mom

OK, since I was racing the deadline, and I actually barely made it, I was thinking about the things I had planned to share but didn’t on the way home. 

Thanksgiving morning Josie was hungry.  Wednesday evening I had pain in my left ear much like the pain I had in my right ear as the shingles were coming on and I had an enormous knot in my left shoulder.  So Dad was using the homemedics on my back while the rolls were rising.  Josie grabbed a pomegranate and wanted it opened.  She went through the kitchen doorway by the stairs and accidentally dropped it on the carpet.  Then when she went to grab it, she actually rolled it along the carpet through the living room.  When it was dropped the skin of the pomegranate ruptured dribbling out a trail of pomegranate juice through the living room.  Dad took spot shot to it and now we have light circles where I suppose the carpet is clean.  Eeewww.  It’s hard to think about improving the house with new carpet when things like this (and the sharpie in the family room) happen. 

Parker couldn’t find his fishing license anywhere last night.  And you weren’t around to offer suggestions of where it could be.  Your room is progressing about as you would suppose it is.

Because the weather was so fine yesterday (Friday) the girls and Dad and I ran to Cascade Park for a half hour or so.  The smaller swirly slide has a huge gash down it and so it’s closed off.  Josie noticed while she was swinging that the castle tops had snow on them (they are bleached  from sun).  I hadn’t realized that this park had aged so much; it was new when you kids were small.

By the way, when I got home from dropping your letter, the pumpkin pie was almost completely gone.  They were willing to eat pumpkin pie for breakfast dessert, but not breakfast.  Go figure.

It’s Grandpa Bramwell’s birthday today.

From Mom November 25, 2014

November 25, 2014

Hello, my boy!

I'm still enjoying your letters and thinking about what you've shared.

Just so you know, I have a noon deadline if I write you through dearelder.com and a 3:00 deadline if I drop a letter through post mart to have same-day delivery. So when I get your mail, I'll respond as I can within those parameters.

I'd like to know more about your companion, his name and where he's from, what his family is like and how he fits in it. Plus his gospel experience if he's shared that.

I hope the language is coming along. It just fascinates me that missionaries become so proficient in such a short period of time. It makes me wonder why I haven't ever really taken the time to gain a second language... in all my spare time, right?

Thanksgiving is upon us and it makes me happy that I made a Thanksgiving dinner while you were still here. I cooked a turkey last night and just had gravy, mashed potatoes, winter squash and peas with leftover cranberry sauce. No stuffing or pies. But Dad took his little turkey nap after dinner. :)

Cambry was able to come home last night. Grandma and Grandpa Parish left for Arizona today to spend Thanksgiving with Uncle Jimmy and Grandpa King. Grandmother Pat is visiting her family for a while and they are helping take care of Grandpa. We will spend Thanksgiving up in Layton. I have pies and rolls for an assignment and will take pumpkin pies only. That makes me think that you need to direct me on letter content in the future: would you rather hear about things like this after they happen so you don't feel left out? Or would you rather hear what we're planning so you can picture what's happening?

We've had a lot of contention the last little bit. I've got a sinus infection again, but I can tell it will dissipate if I am faithful treating it. That explains a lot. But Parker and Aleah are still at each other. That makes you homesick, I'm certain. ;)

It's time for a temple trip. I was looking at the Provo Temple schedule to make sure it wouldn't be closed on me. It only closes the weeks that have Christmas and Thanksgiving in them. I was relieved. I'll think of you and pray for you in all my temple time.

This letter is coming through dearelder.com and my deadline is coming up. But I wanted to share a part of B's letter from yesterday. It made me think of the counsel Bro. Cooper gave you:

"Oooh, so on Saturday night, we skipped dinner (or at least postponed it) until the hour we were supposed to be in, so that we could be out working during daylight hours. It was about 7:38, and we had 20 minutes of proselyting left until dinner. (In the white handbook it explains that typically dinner should be finished no later than 6 pm, but Saturday is an example of an atypical circumstance. With it getting dark these days right before 6:00, the hour of 5-6 is actually our most precious time, and it stinks to have to eat dinner then, because once it's dark it's harder to get people to talk with us. ANYWAY, whenever we don't have a member dinner, we sometimes like to move our dinner hour to make the most of our time). ANYWAY, we were considering going in a few minutes early, because it was DARK, and COLD, and we were hungry. I was driving, and we were both just like, "uh... what should we do?" All our plans and back up plans had fallen through, and we both rationalized, "well, it wouldn't hurt to go in a little bit early." But we both still felt a little guilty for considering that idea, and so RIGHT before we were going to turn into our apartment, I kind of just.... turned the car down this one street we had been working on tracting, but hadn't finished yet. The car just sort of drove itself in front of a specific house, and we were like, "okay, we're going to knock 5 doors real quick then go inside." I didn't have a ton of faith, but I was relieved that we were being obedient, contrary to my human weakness. The VERY FIRST DOOR that we knocked on, the house we had parked in front of, the lady let us in. We taught the restoration. She agreed to meet with us, read The Book of Mormon, and even be baptized if she came to a knowledge of the truth of our message for herself."

One last thing, when I saw Bro. P at Saturday's funeral, I shared with him that he had been an answer to your desire to increase your spirituality. He got misty-eyed and told me to share with you that I had shared this with him. Everyone asks how you are. You have a large cheering section both here and in the spirit world.

Oh yeah, you were in my dreams last night. I don't remember what the peril we were fighting was, but I do remember that you were strong and faithful and tireless in the fight. Go, Riley!

I love you,
Mom

From Mom November 23, 2014

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Dear Riley,

Hi son!  I’m pretty sure I’ll be hearing from you soon as you have to have a Pday within the next couple of days.  I hope you were warm on your temple walk today.  When Sister G spoke to me about seeing you she said you were so happy and you had told her you had an awesome companion.  That’s great news.   She also told me to be certain you had sufficient warm clothing for today’s temple walk.  So after I’d sent the package with goodies, Dad dropped off his coat and gloves in another.  And she wanted you to know that while she can’t bring stuff to you, she can take things home from you.

Parker just came down and showed me the mini Star Wars figures you’d put in his treasure box.  He’s missing you.  I think he felt it more today because he’s used to not having you at school, but you’re supposed to be at church with him. 

Dad is doing tithing settlement now so he’s so busy.  Plus he has the third funeral of three tomorrow: Shirley Neilson, I don’t know if you’d know her by name but only by sight.  She is such a wonderful, faithful woman and we’re sad to lose her.

I called Grandma Parish to wish her happy birthday yesterday and discovered that she was going to make her own birthday cake.  I offered to make it for her and she said she wanted it just the way she wanted it.  So after I’d promised to make it exactly the way she desired, nothing varying, I was permitted to make her a sour cream white cake with buttercream frosting.   The best part is that she wanted me to make my frosting recipe and I didn’t even realize I HAD a frosting recipe because it’s been years since I frosted cake with buttercream.  She didn’t want mousse or whipped cream or any other fandangled thing, just frosting.

I walked it off to her in the cake dome sometime after yesterday’s funeral.  I stayed and visited with her for a minute and then the rest of the family showed up.  While we were visiting, Mike and Shan’l and their family showed up.  Grandma invited us to an enchilada dinner which she had prepared the day before.  I ran home and made Spanish rice and Dad made salsa.  Dinner was lovely.  The kids and I cleaned up Grandma’s kitchen.  Madison was particularly helpful.  Oh, and Westley is like 6’4” now. 

Walking into our house around 9:00 last night, I was discouraged that it was a complete wreck.  It turns out there was about a half bushel of stuff from the girls’ room which had migrated to the front room.  The kitchen was unfinished and I had to cut Parker’s hair.  I was runnin.  Dad said last night that he’s pretty sure that without him, I wouldn’t ever make it to bed.

I realized that I had not prepared adequately for singing time this morning.  The highest priority was to calculate and pay your tithes and our tithes and offerings.  Once I had that done, I sat down to learn the song I was to teach and hope for revelation which would allow me to successfully teach the children without spending much time as I didn’t have any.  After just 15 minutes I had no inspiration and had to leave to visit teach.  Our sister was so warm and we chatted about a lot of things and stayed longer than usual.   Leaving her house, I acted on the impression I had received as I walked out my front door earlier in the morning that I should ask Sister K if she had something prepared from when she was the chorister.  She did and she brought it and I was saved.  Sometimes we have only to be humble enough to let God work in our lives through His other children (and to swallow our pride and ask for help).

When I got home, I had another 15 minutes before I had to be at the church to practice with the choir.  (I played the flute with their song today.)  I got home from church just in time to straighten the front room AGAIN! and get the girls to church.  Though I was only gone 15 minutes practicing there was a big hulabaloo at home between Aleah and Parker.  I haven’t heard either one of them through, though I know for sure that Aleah claims victim and Parker, justified.  Aleah has been a drama queen and difficult because she has not had enough sleep two nights in a row.  Ugh.

We had such a good sacrament meeting.  The T family spoke; they live in the K’s house.  Their little seven year old spoke on tithing.  He was torn when he’d finally earned the $10 award he’d been working toward and he was going to have $14 but hated to give one away to tithing and have only $13.  But he did pay his tithing.  Then when he was cleaning up his room, he found a lost $1.  It was so sweet.  And his mother spoke about tender mercies.  She used a scripture in a way I’d never considered that people are to hear the gospel in their own language to their own understanding.  She said that tender mercies are God speaking to us in a language that we each understand individually.  She told a story from her mission of a woman she had been working with but before the woman had accepted, Sis. T was transferred.  Then on a Pday in her new area, she felt impressed to write this woman a letter.  This was a sacrifice because preparation time is coveted time.  But she did write it and put it in her bag.  Then later after finishing a day of work, she felt undeniably that she needed to mail it.  The impression was so strong that she wrote on the outside of the envelope, “Let me know when you get this.”   The letter arrived one day after this woman was pretty sure she couldn’t make it one more day, but her husband convinced her to hold on one more day.  This letter convinced her that things don’t just happen, but God is in charge and knows her.  This allowed her to accept the gospel.

Brother M came home teaching right after church today and he looks and feels remarkably well!  The ayruvedic medicine that Dad was provided through Mokashi is having a positive impact.  His mind was clearer than it’s been in so long, his eyes are whitening up and his skin isn’t yellow any more.  He’s hoping for years rather than months.  He looks to Eric and wants the kind of miracle Eric was given.  That makes me feel a little guilty for wanting more of a miracle than Eric received.

I’ve got to end.  I love you so much.  People here in the ward love you so much.  You are missed, but we trust in the work to which you are called and your ability to perform it.

Take care,

Mom

From Dad November 21, 2014

November 21, 2014

Re:  Letter 1 of 3

Hey Riley!

Well, life did go on.  I watched as you walked away after we dropped you off at the MTC.  You were faced forward and never looked back.  That’s a great way to approach your mission and I just know you’ll distinguish yourself in every place you serve, including the MTC. 

Your Mother is still weepy and started to cry last night as we sat around the dinner table as six with a place for everyone.  We’ve talked about these emotions and she’s coming to terms with her feelings. She’s now focused on the joy of having a son worthy and desirous to serve in this capacity and not mourning how much she’ll be missing you 12 months in the future.  Josie is missing you and needs a lot more snuggle time. Parker seems to be finding himself and rising above expectations, since he no longer lives in such close proximity to the suffocating burden of pure awesomeness.  Gus?  Well, he’s adopted a morbid hobby of pulling the legs off of spiders.  We’re all coping with your absence in our own ways, but getting along pretty well...

We started tithing settlement last night and so many of the members I met with are impressed by your comments last Sunday, and the caliber of young man you have become.   Bro H mentioned he had seen you in the Book Store the day you arrived, and the Gs are keeping an eye out for you.  Bro. P is particularly tender towards you.  You have a lot of people behind you and praying for your safety and success. Over 10,000 prayers will be offered in your behalf over a 2 year period from your immediate family alone.  Just imagine how many prayers will be offered in your behalf from Ward, and Church members throughout the world. 

I’ve enjoyed reliving my first days in the MTC and imagining how your experience is playing out.  The excitement and newness, the missionary powerhouses whom you look up to who will be leaving for their assignments in a short while, the bonds you form as a district, the love you develop for your MTC President and Branch President, sitting through your first branch meeting while another missionary translates what is being said, sitting in the auditorium while thousands of missionaries sing Called to Serve, and the Spirit!  What a wonderful place!  I can’t think of a better setting to catch on fire with faith, testimony, and missionary zeal.  I pray for your experience over the next two months to far exceed your highest expectations.

Well, I only have a few minutes to get this to the UPS store if you’re to get this today.  Sure do love you.  Tear it up!

Dad

Friday, November 21, 2014

Riley,

I found one of your collar points! 

Parker wore pants to school of his own volition.  Twice!  He is getting all his friends to send him pictures for his contact list.  He’s having fun.  I dropped him off to special needs mutual on the way to taking Aleah to her awards night last night and he told her he hoped she won.  It meant so much to her that she mentioned it on the way home.

Yesterday Josie made Rupunzle’s hair by putting Elise’s sparkling flower earrings in her polly pocket doll braid. 

Josie drew a picture of Apple from Everafter High this morning.  She looked at her progress and then added two legs.  She considered and added two arms.  That is a development milestone.  She’s given the drawing to you.

Aleah was so excited last night at her Reflections award night.  It was so sweet to see her ready to burst.  She was asking at the breakfast table this morning what comes after District, and after State… and after Nationals.  She wants to win it all!

I had a distinct and unusually complex understanding given to me yesterday morning while I was exercising.  What I have experienced in loss of your association I have experienced before.  We’ve been without communication on many occasions.  I was given to understand that what I am grieving is the anticipated losses in the future.  By grieving today for tomorrow’s sorrows, I pay twice and it dampens the joy of today.  It’s OK to feel some twinges of pain at separation, but just as they are recognized it’s best to feel and acknowledge the loss and move on.  I sang, “There’s one less place at our table, There’s one more tear in my eye” last night while setting the table with Josie.

Dear Riley,

We have survived the first hours. I spent time on Facebook changing my profile pic to our hug and the cover to the family photo where all our faces are close together.  I refused to make dinner last night and Aleah made ramen noodles. 

I read Josie "How I Became a Cheerleader" before bed, changing all the Pirates to cheerleaders.  She protested a little but was pretty entertained by it as the story progressed.

Cambry came after work to exchange cars and got me out the door to shop groceries.  But when I got home at 9, you weren't there to direct the storing.  Parker and Dad helped, but I still missed you.  I’m moving at the pace of a tree sloth.

I decided to soak in a bath. But of course that meant that I had to clean the tub and shower stall.  So I got to bed at midnight.  Josie woke us up at 5:30 this morning saying she'd peed in her pajamas.  I didn't respond except a grunt, so Dad got up with her.  She was being so difficult and he was tired (and possibly hungry?) and everything escalated with her screaming downstairs.  So, knowing what I wanted to have happen =more sleep, I went down with her.  She had not had a full accident and had not gone to the bathroom so her bladder was fit to burst.  So after a potty run, we settled in for an hour nap and she is obviously tired, yet sweet this morning.  She frequently gets her hand pinned in that purple pin thingy.  I know you explained to her to her why her hand can’t go between the pins and the Plexiglas and I told her so.  But it’s better than an entire day spend on the boy game, like yesterday.

Parker started off to school this morning but his bike was still at the school from yesterday.  He said he asked you what all the commotion was about this morning while it was happening and you didn't answer.  He decided you were still asleep, but then realized you likely were asleep.... but in the MTC.  I think having your phone is a good distraction for him.

 

I realized it was J C who gave you the $25 and she brought the cookies.  Plus write a thank you to T, M B, and Bro and Sis P.  I will deliver if you send them to me.  Post mart is the best way to get stuff to you, but I’m not sure it works the other way.  Other missionaries will know.

Dad will announce every now and then what he anticipates you're doing right now.  That helps me.  He starts funeral-o-rama, or three funerals in 6 days, today .  This afternoon the girls have piano, I have school community council, Aleah has her Reflections awards, and I have book group tonight. 

I’m going to go exercise now.  Really, I am.  ‘Cause I just ate Josie’s donut.  J

I love you.  Have a wonderful time.

Love,

Mom

Time passes no matter how you spend it.  This was my reasoning.  One week before our last weekend together as a family,  I came down the stairs and said, "Dave, remember when I said I wanted to go to New York?" and he simply asked me where I wanted to go now.  I wanted one last family trip.  And I got it.  Josie woke us Friday morning with, "Hey, guys, we're going camping tonight!  In a hotel!"  We left home as soon as Cambry could get up after class on Friday and were back at home by dinner Saturday.  But it's what happened while we were together that matters.

Josie gave us a funny story:  While she had walked all the way to and from Landscape Arch and to Delicate Arch, Josie consented to riding on David' shoulders from Delicate Arch to the car.  Close the parking lot there is a little bridge which she wanted to walk across herself so she asked to get down.  As soon as she attempted to amble off, she dropped to her hands and knees, "Oh, there are rocks in my socks."  David knew that her feet were asleep, but humored her by taking off each shoe and sock, demonstrating to her that there was nothing there and explained to her what was happening.  She didn't quite trust him and stood up saying, "Oh, they still feel funny."  She crawled on hands and knees until David steadied her to walk the rest.

Hi, sweetie.

You've been in the MTC one whole hour.  Once we got home, and after Josie was tucked in for nap, I wandered the house.  There is much chaos and I want to simultaneously order it and preserve it as a shrine.  I am a spirit in conflict.  I went into your room where Parker was lying on the floor and he rose for a hug.  I opened the closet and Parker pointed out your journal.  I hope you don't mind that I read your one entry just because I was lonesome for you and your handwriting and words brought you closer. 

Dad has moved on to the basement and took Aleah with him to pick up the door for the storage room. Aleah had set up her paper in the stairway headed down to the piano and I snapped a shot of her journal entry for you.  Elise has been soothing herself at the piano.  I think you'll miss her tinkling away her troubles.  She has to go put up lights in the condos.  Sister Kolz called to remind her and asked if you were already in the MTC.  Elise held her composure until she was off the phone and then cried in my arms saying you may not feel homesick, but we surely will be Riley-sick.

I don't want to make you homesick, but I think you will like knowing that we each are dealing with the loss of your companionship.  

You are such a joy to us all.  I was looking at the black chairs in the living room and thinking you're not going to spontaneously get them downstairs for me.  Blah.  

I'm sorry I didn't get love notes stashed in your pockets like I'd planned.  But everytime you see my PARISH inscription, know I love you.  I think so highly of you.  I am continually grateful for you and your goodness to me and your dad and the rest of our children.  I hope you love your companion and I hope you can help your district learn Thai.  I know you will.  I can envision you quietly taking in the scene at the MTC and nodding your head and thinking behind your eyes, "Alright. I got this."  Because you do.

I'll write again soon.

I love you,
Mom